“Thick as the body you dream of. Soft as your excuses.”

Material: 100% Cotton French Terry – stitched tough enough to survive leg day (Grindkin Tested).
Fabric Weight: 425 GSM – heavy like your gym guilt and zombie feet.
No Pilling: Survives 100+ washes — outlasts your motivation.
Preshrunk: Max 3% shrinkage – It’s actually your gains, not garment shrinkage.
Colorfast ISO 4/5: Won’t fade (unlike your gym goals for new year).
Care: Machine wash cold. Air dry. Moldy Mike hates refund requests.
Fit Style: Semi-Oversized – for lifters, slackers, and snackers.

Spotter Repellent: They’ll abandon you (just like your EX).
Conversation Starter: “Is that zombie doing deadlifts?” → “He’s dead and still lifting. No excuses..”
Durability: Survives your workout, your breakup, and possibly the apocalypse

Buy it before your gains rot. Or before the Duke raises gym taxes again.

Embroidered Apparel Care – Or Else:

Washing: Hand-wash cold (inside-out), gentle cycle, mild detergent.
- "Grindkin cries when you use hot water."
Stains: If colors bleed, rinse in lukewarm → cold water repeatedly.
- "Digi-Gourd suggests sacrificing a sock to the laundry gods."
Bleach: AVOID chlorine like Pumpkin Dule avoids cardio.
Drying:
- Tumble dry cool or air dry ("Sunlight fades designs faster than P.R. Rind’s patience").
- Never let wet hoodies pile up ("Moldy Mike will claim them").
Ironing: Inside-out, between cloth layers. NO STEAM – "Embroidery isn’t a sauna."
Dry Cleaning: Allowed, but "the Hollowed Ones judge silently."